Last night, Nate and I had plans to be at a friend's house at 7:00. For once we were early, so we were taking our time getting there. It was up the mountain behind our house, so we were winding around the curves and enjoying the scenery and chatting. All at once, a car zoomed around us, cut us off, pulled to a screeching stop in front of us, and waved us over. We pulled up to the car and rolled our window down. The woman was gesturing wildly and yelling, but we couldn't hear what she was saying, so Nate held his hand up to his ear. She didn't want to roll her window down, but she finally did and yelled, "Just WHO do you think you are? You do NOT own the road! You were not even going the speed limit! Some of us have places that they need to be! SOME people..." At this point, I was just staring at her with my mouth hanging open. Nate said, "I'm sorry, ma'am, for keeping you from getting where you need to be, go right ahead." And she threw her hands up and said, "Oh no. You go. Keep moving!" Nate said, "No, we don't want to hold you up." And she just kept shaking her head back and forth forcefully. So, we rolled our window up and kept going and watched her turn into her driveway that she was already at. We looked at each other and began dying laughing. Nate said, "Well, I can honestly say that I have never been yelled at for driving too slow." Keep in mind that we were going about 45 on curvy uphill roads. We passed another sign for an s-curve and it said Speed Limit 30 on it. I felt the need to quote Beth Moore, "Bless her heart. I don't think she had time to say her morning prayer today." I am still a little confused about the whole situation, but I have learned a few things.
1. No one looks attractive when they are mad.
Her face was flushed, her hair was mussed, and her nose was wrinkled, and her eyes were large. My kids always notice how bad I look when I'm mad, Drew told me last week that sometimes I look nice until I start yelling. Then I look ugly. I am also known for flaring my nostrils, if you remember that story.
2. There is nothing we could do or say at that point to take away her anger.
Her mind was made up, and all we could do was apologize and move on.
3. Anger breeds anger.
We had been in a great mood, but the more we thought about it, the more tempting it was to lash back at her. As we went by the 30 mph sign, we were so tempted to point at it. I begin thinking, "What in the world was HER problem. Like she really needed to put all of us in danger by passing us in a curve and cutting us off." Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: because it only leads to evil. Psalm 37:8
4. I've been there.
No, I've never flagged some random person down and told them everything they've done to make me mad, but I've been angry at people when it wasn't even their fault. It might feel good at the time to make someone else feel bad just because I'm having a bad day, but when I lay down at night, I regret it. But by the grace of God, I am what I am.
5. More than anyone else I've come in contact with this week, she needed the gift of grace and forgiveness.
I forgive her. And I feel sorry for her. She obviously was under a lot of pressure. Who knows, maybe she is going through a divorce, or maybe her child has cancer and needed some medicine, or maybe she was going to lose her job if she was late. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and brawling, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:31-32
6. Be very careful to keep my anger in check.
Righteous anger is one thing, but bitterness and pressure can build up and blow at any time. Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: for the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God. James 1:19-20
7. Forget being early to anything else.
We get along a lot better if we're hurried and stressed. Nobody yells at us when we're late.